Marle's Box: A Greek myth
by CronoCat
Summary: Okay, basically this is Pandora's Box if the Greeks knew about Chrono Trigger. Warning: I made Marle a huge ditz. I don't know if she normally is, but it just fit so well. This idea just came to me one day in English class, so I hope you people like it! P


Disclaimer: Very unfortunately I do not own any of the characters from Crono Trigger. Also, I obviously don't own the story about Pandora's Box. That said, sit back and enjoy. 

Author's Note: Oh yeah, a warning: this is a spur of the moment story and is CRAZY....the idea just kind of came to me in English class. I was sitting there thinking how everyone has heard the story of Pandora's Box so it's old, boring stuff. But not if...(drum roll) it had CRONO in it!!! Please give me lots of reviews! 

Pandora, I mean, Marle's Box

"A long, long time ago, in the age when people were just beginning, the Gods of the world reigned. They lived up in the clouds, on a huge mountain covered with gold and riches. 

One day, a small, lame god came walking up the huge glowing steps. He was the blacksmith for these supreme beings and the God of the Heavens had called him to make something," the narrator said in a loud booming voice. 

"Hey, I'm not lame!" Slash suddenly yelled, brandishing both swords. "And why aren't I a god?"

"Anyway...so, Slash the Blacksmith had been called by the God of the Heavens. When he reached the top of the steps, he was frightened by the loud voices of the Gods;" the narrator went on calmly. 

"WELCOME TO THE OLYMPICS!!" A man cried, appearing before Slash. "I am the God of Turning People into Frogs and Doing Other Mean Things Like That. My name...the great and powerful MAGUS!"

"And I'm supposed to be scared?" Slash asked. 

"Magus! You got your lines all wrong again. You're messing everything up! This isn't the Olympics, this is Mt. Olympus!" The narrator yelled angrily. 

"Oh yeah? Same thing!" Magus yelled back. 

"Whatever...so, Magus, the God of Turning People into Frogs, ect. turned to Slash and said-"

"Get the hell outta here!" Magus interrupted. 

"You can't speak to me like that!" Slash shot back. 

"GUYS! That's _not_ what Magus says...he, uh, meant to say 'Blacksmith, make me a statue of a beautiful girl.'" The narrator informed them. 

"I did?"

"What does he want with a statue of a girl?" Slash asked curiously. 

"Never mind, just go make one!" Magus said, pushing Slash out the door. 

"So Slash worked day and night and finally the statue was done," the narrator explained. 

"Where's my statue, punk? I mean...lame blacksmith," Magus smirked. 

"Huh? I'm not done yet! Ahhhhhhh....wait, wait! Just a few more minutes..." Slash pleaded, backing away from Magus' scythe. 

"And so Slash worked day and night _again_," sighed the narrator. 

"Wow! I didn't think you could make something so pretty..." Magus said in surprise. 

"Yup, I carved her completely myself, with just these two beauties," he grinned and held up twin swords. "Made her out of the finest synthetic materials," Slash added proudly. 

"Good, good. Now what?" Magus asked, looking up. "Well? Wake up narrator!"

"Zzzz...huh? What? Oh, sorry! Well, the statue was a beautiful thing and Magus called the Goddess of Beauty."

"Why would I do that?" Magus demanded. 

"Because it's in the script..."

"So?"

"Anyway, the Goddess of Beauty swooped down into the room. On her head she wore a crown of laurel leaves. Her long white dress sparkled," the narrator said sleepily. 

"Here I am!" Cried a happy voice. 

"_Fiona?_" Slash and Magus asked in surprise. 

"Yes, I am the Goddess of Beauty. What is your bidding, Magus?" She asked, pleasantly. 

"And Magus smiled and said, 'Dear Fiona, put the breath of life into this beautiful statue.'"

"What? I did not!" Magus cried indignantly. 

"You were supposed to say that," the narrator sighed. 

"Hello everyone!" 

"Who's there?" Slash asked, grabbing his two swords. 

"Why, Slashie-Poo, it's me! Flea!" And Flea drifted gracefully into the room, her black dress shimmering with jewels. 

"Hey! You're not in the script!" The narrator cried angrily. 

"I should be...why can't _I_ be the goddess of beauty?" Flea pouted. 

"You're not pretty..." Fiona informed Flea. 

"Yeah, besides, we'd have to switch you around everyday. One day you'd be the Goddess, the next day the God and on and on. What gender are you today, Flea?" Magus smirked.

"Shut up, Magus!"

"You can't speak to a GOD like that. You should bow respectfully and say, Yes, O Mighty One. I worship you, Magus, the God of Turning People into Frogs-"

"_Anyway_, Fiona came close to the statue and blew the breath of life towards this gorgeous statue," the narrator cut in. 

"Say, this statue kind of looks like me," Fiona said, as she walked up to it. 

"Duh, you're the Goddess of Beauty. Now, just get on with it, would you?" Magus said impatiently. 

So Fiona did and the statue slowly became a real girl, in a long, flowing dress. She sat up and looked vacantly around the room. 

"The statue came to life and Magus sent the others away. Then he took the girl-"

"What's he gonna do with her? I thought Magus didn't like girls or anyone..."Fiona asked, worried. 

"Heh, I can guess what he's going to do," Slash chuckled dryly. 

"Get your mind out of the gutter, you dirty boy!" Flea cried, slapping him. Then she grabbed his arm and yanked Slash out of the room. 

"Leave already," Magus said crossly. 

"I'm going, I'm going..." Fiona said, skittering out the door. 

"Ahem, so Magus took the potion he had already made and gave it to the girl to drink." The narrator said loudly. 

Magus looked around wildly and quickly found this potion. "Here." He grunted, shoving it into her hands. 

"Oooo, yummy!" She cried and drank it all at once. 

"Little did she know that she had just taken the Elixir of Curiosity."

"Who's that? Where's that voice coming from? Where am I? Who am I? Who are you? What's my name? How did I get here? What did you just give me to drink? What's that?"

"Shut up!" Magus screamed when she finally stopped for breath. 

"Why?"

"Because you're annoying!"

"She can't help it. _You_ gave her the potion..."the narrator told Magus.

"Who's that? What potion?" The girl asked, running around, looking for the source of the voice. 

"Sit down. It's the stupid Narrator. I don't know where the narrator is. I'm Magus, the God of Turning People into Frogs and Other Mean Things Like That. You don't have a name. Slash, the lame blacksmith made you. You're on Mt. Olympus and now, don't talk!"

"Why shouldn't I talk? I have so many questions! Why did Slash make me? Where is he? Why are you such a mean god? What's Mt. Olympus? Why don't I have a name? What if I want a name? Do I ever get one?" The girl questioned eagerly. 

"Give her that other potion...the bright pink one," the narrator said. 

"Anything to keep this annoying brat from talking! Drink this, because I command you to, and it's a yummy pink soda," Magus said, shoving the beaker into her hands. 

The girl sniffed it curiously. "What is it really?"

"You'll just have to drink it and find out," he informed her. 

"What if it's poison? I could die! I'd better not...but I just can't stand not knowing!" And with that, she swallowed it all. 

"I hope it works..."Magus said, backing away nervously. 

"Cha, like that was pretty yummy, but why? Like, what's in it? Do you know? He he, like I totally have no idea. So, like maybe I shouldn't have drank it? But I didn't know any better? Wow, like, where'd that narrator go? I like, liked her?"

"AAAAAAAHHH!!!! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!" Magus cried in horror. 

"I think you made her ditzy, stupid _and_ curious..."the narrator said, in a scared little voice. 

"No, I think you told me to give that to her. This is ALL YOUR FAULT!"

"He he, like don't blame anyone? Because, like, why is it all her fault? Dude, can I have a name yet? I'm dying to know what it is?"

"Do you have to make every sentence a question?" Magus moaned, covering his ears. 

"Like, I don't know?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!" Magus ran from the room. 

"Well...okay, then the girl went to where the God of the Heavens was sitting."

"Why did she do that?" The girl asked, obediently walking. 

"So he could give her a name and a final gift," the narrator explained. 

"Oh, I wonder what my name will be! Like, I'm majorly excited? WOW!" She cried, skipping away. 

"Oh my god...I should _never_ have taken this job," the narrator moaned. 

"Wow, so like where's the God of the Heavens? Like, maybe he's hiding? Is he scared of me? What kind of a name will he give me? Like, do I have to wear this dress?" 

"Grrr...of course he's not hiding! Anyway...So, the girl walked to the throne and saw the God of the Heavens sitting there. Struck dumb by his brilliance, the girl fell silent and bowed before the highest god in the sky. This god was big and tough looking. His spiky red-hair stood up like a crown of fire. In his hand, he held a lightening bolt."

"Like, oh my gosh, he's really big? And scary? And, like, cute?" The girl bubbled nervously. 

"Forget the struck dumb part..."

"Huh? What part was that? Could you say that again? And like, why so...sarcastic?"

"...Crono, God of the Heavens gave the girl yet another gift. A name," the narrator continued wearily. 

"A name? Finally! Like, I hope it will be good? With a good meaning? What is it?! Tell me! I'm sooo curious!" The girl begged, throwing herself at his feet. 

"Well, Crono smiled down on the girl and blessed her with the name-" the narrator began. 

"Marle," Crono cut in quickly. 

"No...you're _supposed _to name her Pa-" 

"Marle? I think I might like that. What's it mean? Why'd you choose it? What does it mean? Why don't you talk? Is that stupid narrator going to like, say all your lines?" Marle interrupted. 

"Marle: Curious, annoying, not so bright," Crono said shortly. 

"You're supposed to name her Pandora, meaning gift from the gods," the narrator scolded. 

"Pandora? No, definitely not working for me. Did each god give me a gift? Why?" Marle asked.

"Never mind," groaned the narrator. 

Crono pulled a script out from under the throne. "Hmm...oh yeah! Oh, Lucca, Goddess of Intelligence! Come here!"

"Good! So Crono called forth Lucca to grant Marle one last gift," the narrator said approvingly. 

"One more gift? Wow! This is like, so totally cool!"

"I'm here!" Lucca panted, rushing in. Her purple hair stuck up all over her head and her glasses were askew. 

"What took you so long?" Crono asked impatiently. 

"Took me so long? It only took me 2.9897766524325 seconds...but I could be wrong," she hastily added, seeing Crono glare at her. 

"Lucca gave Marle a gift of intelligence," the narrator said, adding, "about time..."

"Like, oh my gosh! How come you're so smart? Like, did you study a lot in school? He he, were you one of the dorky kids in the class? Do you like the God of the Heavens? I do, because I like, think he's cute?" Marle exclaimed eagerly. 

"Dorky? Who are you calling dorky? And I'm smart because I'm the Goddess of Intelligence!" Lucca cried loudly. 

"AHEM! Lucca gave Marle a gift..." the narrator reminded Lucca. 

"I'd rather not. It appears she is already quite..._gifted_," Lucca said loftily. 

"Like, why did you say that? Are you mad or something? Am I gifted?"

"Help me!" Lucca begged, rolling her eyes and inching away from Marle. 

"Okay, so the Goddess of Intelligence did not give Marle a gift after all. I was just lying before," the narrator sighed. 

"I'll protect you!" Cried Crono, diving in front of Marle. 

"My hero!" Lucca sighed. 

"Yes ma'am! That's me," Crono struck a heroic pose as the scene faded out. 

"Now then...Here we are, in a lovely new scene," the narrator said in a falsely cheerful voice. Suddenly with a loud bump, a large painted backdrop fell down, covering the one of Mt. Olympus. 

"Here we are at a little house belonging to the God of Afterthought. Actually, the house of a really stupid person. So, what happened was, Crono was angry with this moronic guy that lives here. And he had Marle created to send her down as a gift to plague mankind. Which was obviously a good plan, because she is really annoying," the narrator explained. 

"Wheeeeee! I'm like flying! How is this happening? Like, how are you doing this? And why? I wanted to stay with Crono, because he's like cute!" Marle burbled happily as Kino, the messenger god, flew her down to earth. 

"Kino like flying!" He informed her. 

"Why? Where are we going? When are we gonna get there? What's this jar for?"

"Kino like flying!"

"Uh, you like, said that already?"

"He he, Kino really, really, like flying! Oh, eating good too!" Kino giggled.

"Oh my god! I like to eat too! No way!" Marle cried in amazement. 

"Oh dear...Well, Kino put Marle down on the ground in front of the stupid man's house," the narrator went on. 

"Now? Kino no see house!" 

"It's right...there!" The narrator said triumphantly as a little house suddenly slid into view. 

"Sorry folks..." Apologized the set crew as they quickly finished hammering and then ran away. 

"Oh! Kino see house now! Kino go there?"

"Yes...good Kino..."

"Ooo! Like, whose house is that? Who lives there? Am I going to live there? Are we stopping? Don't you want to fly more?" Marle asked hurriedly. 

"Fly more!"

"No! Bad Kino!" The narrator scolded as Kino whimpered and landed in front of the house. 

"No fly..." he wailed as Marle joined in. 

"Just then, the Really Stupid Person walked out of his house!" The narrator yelled over the sobbing of Kino and Marle. 

"Who's sobbing on my doorstep?" Bellowed Ozzie, as he stumbled outside. 

"Big man. Shake ground! AAAAAAAAHH!!" Kino cried. 

"Who are you? What's your name? Do you live here? Do you like it? Why are you so big? It's like, scary?"

"So, Ozzie, the Really Stupid Person was convinced by Kino to take Marle to be his wife, as she was a gift of apology from the Highest God, Crono."

"Here. You take," Kino said, shoving Marle into Ozzie. Then he took off into the sky and flew home. "Kino like flying!!!"

"Wow, are we like, married? I'm like, a gift from gods? Oh my gosh, this is like, so exciting?"

"Ozzie was uh, easily won over by the girl's sweet, caring nature. Plus he was too stupid to be annoyed by her curiosity. And so the two were married and lived in many years of peace. Except Marle had been given a large jar to give Ozzie. This jar was from Crono and he had filled it with horrible things to plague mankind, but mainly Ozzie," the narrator said. 

"Husband, what is that?"

"Uh...I dunno. Maybe it's a jar of bad things?" Ozzie suggested, eyeing the earthenware jug. 

"No, don't be silly. Can I like, open it? Pretty please? I'm like, dying to know what's inside!" Marle cried, rushing to the jar and trying to take the lid off. 

"No! Don't touch it! It could be dangerous..." Ozzie said wisely. 

"Wow, since like when did you get so smart?" Marle asked, looking at him in awe. 

"Well, the jar wouldn't leave Marle alone. She was just dying to know what it contained. So late one night, she slipped into the yard where the jar was kept-" the narrator began excitedly. 

"Like, I'm just _ dying _to know what's inside!" Marle whispered, creeping over the jar and trying to open it. "Like, the lid won't come off! Why not? I've just got to know! Should I be quiet? Yes...why? Hmm...quiet, quiet, shhhh," she whispered to the jar and then silently picked up a hammer. Still shushing the container, she lifted the hammer and smacked the jar into millions of pieces. 

"From within the jar came all the bad things that we know today and-"

"Wait, if that's where all the bad things come from, how did I get here?" Interrupted Magus. 

"Get off the set! You're not in this scene!" The narrator hissed. 

"But I should be..." Magus complained, walking away. 

"Anyways...from within the jar come all the bad things that we now have in our world. Marle was very frightened, so she screamed and Ozzie came running."

"AAAAAAAAHH!!"

"Oh no! You stupid girl! Look what you've done! You broke my beautiful vase!" Ozzie cried.

"And of course, he wasn't very comforting. So, Marle went back to Mt. Olympus, having fulfilled her duty on earth. The end," the narrator said happily. 

"WAIT! We don't want her back here! YOU CAN KEEP HER!!" Lucca screeched. 

"Why? You don't like me? Don't you care that my feelings are hurt? Why wouldn't you ever give me a gift? I did a good job, didn't I? Why are you so angry?"

"Someone...help me, please!" Lucca whimpered. 

"Kino help!" He cried, picking her up and flying around. 

"I think I'm going to be airsick..." Lucca moaned. 

"No airsick! Kino like flying! Lucca too, so no sick!" He scolded, flying upside-down. 

"Ooo! Like, can I go next? Please? Ooo, I like, love flying!" Marle cried, doing a little happy dance. 

"The End," the narrator announced firmly. 

"Why?" Marle questioned as a big red curtain fell, followed by...

*THE END*


End file.
